MOMS AND DADS: This is one of those times when I really want to know what YOU think! I heard a story this week from a friend, a teacher at a Catholic elementary school, about current trends in First Communion fashion. My friend made the point—correctly, it seems to me—that the significance of this holy occasion has been dwarfed in recent years by an emphasis on social trends and styles. |
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Here’s the situation:
- At the Catholic school in question, from what I’ve heard, parents no longer buy their daughters’ Communion dresses at Sears or J.C. Penney. Today’s fashions more likely come from bridal shops, where they carry price tags up to $750.
- One mother, who had found a “great price” on a dress for only $375, was furious because another girl in the second grade class was planning
to wear the same dress. The mom went out and bought six more dresses—but to her dismay her daughter, age seven, loved the original dress and could not be persuaded to wear a different one.
- Although the traditional white dress has long been a symbol for purity and innocence, this year the school had permitted students to wear ivory dresses as well. Not such a big deal, perhaps, but my friend worried that it further reduced the sacramental celebration to “just another day.”
- And after Mass, today’s students headed home, or to the local country club or hotel ballroom, for an extravaganza with fine dining, expensive gifts, and probably a rock band.
So what do YOU think? Does all this hoopla at a child’s First Holy Communion distort the meaning, focusing the child’s attention on superficial things while the real meaning, the reception of Jesus into one’s heart, is relegated to a distant second place? Or do the fancy dress and shoes (or new suit and tie for the little guys), fresh haircut, and big party serve to remind young children what a singularly important event this really is?
Please share your own experiences. Be prepared to explain WHY you made the choice you did. Would you do it differently (one way or the other), if you could?
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My first daughter wore a white “flower girl” dress from a wedding that she was in. I “splurged” on my second daughter’s FHC dress, but it was nowhere near the prices you mention. My third daughter will be making her FHC next year and I will give her the choice of wearing either of her sisters’ dresses or getting one of her own. My take is that it is a very special day so I want her to feel special. I am actually more upset by the companies that feel the need to sexualize the First Communicants with make-up or immodest dresses. http://www.facebook.com/photo.php?fbid=489496692895&set=a.442527457895.242660.256001802895&type=1&theater
When my daughter made her communion, she wore something traditional, white dress and veil. It wasn’t expensive, because we couldn’t afford that much. But it was pretty.
At that parish parents could choose which Mass their child would receive first communion, and I believe they could choose any Sunday in May. The whole family sat together. We chose the early Mass that we normally attend, and our daughter was the only child making her first communion at that one. We had no idea that would be the case.
I remember my own First Communion: the white dress and veil, white shoes, lace-trimmed socks. My gifts included $20 (total, in increments of $1 and $2) and a Cinderella watch from my godparents. We had a picnic in the backyard, with all the aunts and uncles.
So many people related their own experiences on Facebook! Several posted links to websites showing seven-year-old children posed provocatively, wearing heavy eyeshadow and mascara and lipstick. They certainly topped my report, showing the extremes which can obscure the spiritual significance of the day.
THANK YOU!!! My first communion dress came from Sears and since when did it become acceptable to allow spaghetti strap dresses to a sacremental occasion????
Confused Dress Consumer
Mary
Congratulations! May 20 was the date of my first communion, many years ago. May God bless you today and always.